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Last night, while driving home from my men's group, I noticed a young man standing alone in a bus shelter. It was the motion that caught my eye. Rocking back and forth, hugging himself in a flimsy, white blanket, his breath made clouds in the 20-degree air.
I’m guessing he had nothing on under the blanket but pants, a shirt, maybe a very light jacket. The shelter was quite dark, so I don’t think the infrared heaters were working.
AN ILL-FITTING GARMENT
I often wonder about strangers, especially when they’re alone—who they are, what they’re doing, what’s their story. But for some reason, in this fellow’s case the question that struck me was, Where are you going?
Are you on your way home? Going to see a friend? Off to your night shift? I probably shouldn’t read too much into such details, but somehow the blanket feels like a poignant answer to those questions. A garment less chosen than scrounged.
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| PHOTO: Lily Fulop |
What if, I asked myself, you’re homeless? What if all your family bridges have burned? What if the next bus provides the only shelter you’re going to find tonight? Do you even have the fare?
And, again, that insistent question: Where will you get off?
How easily we take for granted
our destinations in life.
DESTINATION: SURVIVAL
The young man drew just a passing glance, but he’s been on my mind ever since. It’s not just curiosity and compassion, but also sadness. For, even if my reckoning on his particular plight is misplaced, I know there are countless others tonight for whom it would not be.
How easily we take for granted our destinations in life. Appointments, a job, social occasions… Even if our engagement’s with no one but a favorite place, we’re very seldom without an aim in our comings and goings.
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| PHOTO: Kidstuff Counseling |
But when the notion of belonging somewhere lies beyond reach, do you think a person’s idea of “destination” might change from one of place to one of time? How long can I stay on this warm bus? When will they kick me out?
For some—like perhaps this young man—the aim is simply survival. Can I make it till morning?
I’ve decided there must be some purpose,
some intent, in my having noticed him.
CAUSES, EFFECTS, REMEDIES
I used the same excuses most of us would for not stopping and just asking the kid these questions, maybe helping him out. Instead, I weigh his fortunes from afar, from a world of warmth and belonging.
Nonetheless, I’ve decided, there must be some purpose, some intent, in my simply having noticed him. And, yes, in contemplating the causes, effects and remedies for homelessness and its attendant ills.
In 2024, it’s estimated that .23 percent of Americans—roughly 770,000 of us—
experienced homelessness.*
To be honest, I don’t think I’ll be out anytime soon looking to engage, face to face, folks like this young man who look displaced. But I am moved to find and start supporting an organi- zation that provides effective, reliable “housing first” services and programs here in Minneapolis.
Among those I’m considering: Avivo Village—which provides indoor communities of “tiny houses; People Serving People—focusing on keeping people in their existing homes; or the United Way—which engages citizens, businesses and organizations in combating homelessness.
Just imagine how it might feel if, especially during this busy, destination-rich holiday season, you had nowhere to go, nowhere to be. I hope that, like me, you’re moved to help our fellow citizens—like my White-blanket Man—whose home might very well exist only in their dreams.
* National Alliance To End Homelessness
2 comments:
This blog post moved me to tears, not only the story of the blanket-clad man, but your honesty about not stopping, as well as your insights into how 'insular' we become in our warm homes, warm clothes, boots, gloves, safe jobs, plentiful food, safe extended families or friends, and so on.
People living homeless have always tugged most strongly on my heart. Although throughout my life I have responded both ways, sometimes stopping, asking, and helping....and other times not feeling quite comfortable doing so if I was alone and it was night, or I felt not so safe. However, over the last couple of years I have become increasingly aware of my own, sometimes seemingly precarious situation. Having lost all 6 of my closest lifelong friends during Covid, and then moving, and going through relationship changes, and so on, much more of my 'insulation' has been removed. I feel a deep need to plug into my community and to help those around me. I feel a need to grow highly productive gardens so I can give food to those in dire need. I feel a need to give my 'extras' to those who could not otherwise afford them, I feel a deep river pulling me to help my fellow humans. I forget myself, and experience a profound Connection to Humanity, both my own and others, a Connection that fills me with tears, tenderness, and compassion, one that makes life so truly Rich.
I've always felt my Connection to the Living Earth and my need to protect and cherish, but now....I feel pulled toward my own Humanity....as well as those around me.
Thank you, dear Jeffrey, for your honest, deeply moving story and insights. Thank you for choosing to help, for choosing to become part of the great River of Humanity. I am moved to tears, and so proud of you.....and inspired by you to do likewise. Always, with much respect and love. Robin
PS: I wish you and your family so much love and joy over the holiday season.
My dear Robin – First, I had no idea the depth of your loss in recent years. Losing one's friends would be enough to bring anyone down. But that depth is matched by the depth of your compassion, your heart and soul. You've come to explore life's most essential connections -- something few of us have allowed ourselves.
Thank you for listening, as few can, to life, to love, to wonder...and to me.
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